Can't we find a middle ground?

Rest, Reflect, Refresh, Reconnect

Today’s sermon at church was really interesting. Wes, the associate pastor at my church, did the sermon because Mike, our senior pastor is in Pakistan (pray for his safety!). I wish I had taken notes, and I even debated writing this post until tomorrow, but I decided against it. I don’t know if I can commit to anything tomorrow after the fact.

Anyway, the sermon was on Sundays and what they look like for a Christian. Wes has apparently been researching this for a few years, and although he doesn’t think he’s got it totally right yet, those four words were kind of his conclusions thus far about what Sundays are for Christians. I have been thinking about what this means for me and these are what have come up with.

Rest:
What does rest mean for me? Is it limiting the number of things I do that I consider work on Sundays? What do I consider as work?
Is it limiting something else I do on Sundays?
Wes mentioned music. Is it limiting my music intake?
What about schoolwork or homework? I already know that I will never take a Sunday class. Is that enough?
What about my internet? Am I so addicted to Facebook that I can’t let go of that for a day? Is that was enslaves me and pulls my attention from God? I don’t want to, but maybe I do need to take a break from internet (or at least social networking) for Sundays.
But then I wonder, is that enough? Can I or should I do more? Maybe that’s a start that is good enough for now.

Reflect:
How can I do this on Sundays more than other times during the week?
Pray more?
Read my Bible more?
Listen to more Christian music?
Is the answer to all three of those yes?
What about taking notes during the sermon to be more actively engaged? I like that idea. Maybe these are all Sunday activities I should be doing.

Refresh:
This is probably the hardest to come up with things for. I understand the concept, but how do I make sure it happens?
I think the answer is knowing why I go to church. Do I go to glorify God? Or do I go for another reason? Am I there to work? Sometimes. Sometimes, I show up without the time to rest (there’s that word again…I think it needs to be revisited right about now…) and be with God. I know that’s not refreshing. Do I need to cut the extra work I do for others? What about if someone grabs me and asks if I can do nursery because they “just need another helper in there today”? Do I say no? Do I agree to do it? Is it too much work for the Sabbath? It’s definitely distracting. It definitely takes away from God. But I’m a work-a-holic with the spiritual gift of service. I do those kinds of things! But is it too much? I don’t know the answer to this one yet, since for now, I know that I am supposed to be working at Pathway. But there are six days to work…maybe I need one off.

Reconnect:
This is one I think I already do pretty good at for Sundays. I am a rather bad introvert, so going to church forces me to be with people. It sets my plans for the week and makes times to be with others in a world where I could easily decide to lock myself up in my room and never come out. In this way, it’s rejuvinating and refreshing (there’s THAT word again! These all seem to connect…). If I have been by myself all week, this breaks the mold and reminds me that there are other people out there and that they actually CARE about me and my well-being (wow, what a novel concept!). What’s more, I can remind them I care about them and that I am happy to see tem on this one day a week. It kills me the most when Greysha comes up to me and asks if I can read her the Bible and I say I can’t because I have to go work somewhere. That is the WORST! I miss that connection with her because I failed to (say it with me…) REST!

In conclusion, they are all connected and they are all important (yeah, that’s my for a conclusion).

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Focus on Parenting Simulcast

So, I spent all last week working to make sure the Focus on Parenting simulcast that happened today happened smoothly, although I had no intentions of actually going. Well, by Wednesday, Leanne had convinced me that I just HAD to go and that I could go as a helper (even though they already had more than enough volunteers to do everything…but hey, I got a free ticket, t-shirt, and name badge out of it, so I’m not complaining). The reason I originally hadn’t planned on going was because of my school, but I really wanted to go because Matthew West, one of my favorite singers, was doing worship. So I decided I was going to go to school, turn in my essay, quickly take my test, and scram so I didn’t miss too much of the actual conference.

So, anyway, I get there at 7:15am along with the other helpers and stand around for an hour and 15 minutes because there was nothing for me to do (way more helpers than needed were present). So I figured I better not worry about helping out and just focus on the conference. Which I did. It was actually very nice to be at a church event I worked to prepare, but didn’t need to work on the actual day for. I was more able to relax and focus on what was being said.

Matthew West was first and he is actually kind of disappointing in concert…at least when he’s in a setting like that. After him, Mark Holman talked about bringing faith to the home and his book, which has been the basis of our church’s total reshapement (is that even a word?) of our whole ministry to focus on equipping authentic disciples through faith at home. He was my second favorite. After he spoke, we had a 20 minute break and I had to dash to school. While at school, I missed Larry Fowler who I was told, continued the topic of faith at home started by Mark Holman.I got back in time for Elisa Morgan, the founder of MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). She was a HIGHLY energetic woman and very real and inspiring. She had some great stories and some great encouragement. I think she was kind of over the top, though, although I am guessing that’s just her normal personality. She talked about her book, “She Did What She Could”, and I really liked that what she said could be applied to everyone, whether they were parents or not (which I am not, nor will I be any time soon). I enjoyed her talk overall, although some of it was a little confusing, when she was talking about the “What” portion of the phrase.

After her was lunch, and I got to hang out with the “big kids”. I don’t really ever get to do that because I am often still considered a youth, despite being graduated and over 18. But I’m one of the only people in the church at this age (literally, here’s only like 4 or 5 that I know of, and mos aren’t very active at all in the church), so I’m normally lumped into the younger kids. But the youth were all in the childcare areas and I was hanging with the adults. That was pretty neat.After lunch was Dr. Kevin Leman, the FUNNIEST guy I have ever heard speak. I even think he is near Holly Shorts in brilliance and hilarity(don’t think that’s a word, either). Kristy actually dated his nephew once and she said that Dr. Leman is even more animated in real life. He had some great practical ways to care for children, and if I had bought any book at the conference, it would have been his (called “Have a New Kid by Friday”). I am betting it’s hilarious!

After him was another break, then the media discernment panel, which was probably the most immediately useful thing for me that I heard all day. It wasn’t the most interesting, but it was definitely chalk (chalk…haha) full of good information about the media and the effects it has on people and households. I actually disagreed with one of the answers one of the people gave about whether adults should be held to the same standards as kids over what they watch. He said no, I thought they should. Why in the world would I want to watch something I don’t want my kids to see? There is no reason I can think of for that to be okay (you must understand I’m not talking about a toddler, I’m talking about a pre-teen or teenager). Other than that, I thought their info and advice was great.Overall, I walked away with a lot of facts. (I so wish I had taken notes! I didn’t think it would be that interesting!) I also walked away with a hope that, when it does come time for me to have kids, I can indeed do it in a godly way. Not saying I won’t mess up every once in a while, because I will, but it IS possible to raise a kid in this day and age to follow Christ above all else.

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Spring is Coming

This is the twelfth and final track off Steven Curtis Chapman’s new album, Beauty Will Rise. It is about new and beautiful things growing up through despair and death.

Spring is Coming
by Steven Curtis Chapman

We planted the seed while the tears
Of our grief soaked the ground
The sky lost its sun and the world
Lost its green to lifeless brown
Now, the chill in the wind
Has turned the earth hard as stone
And silent, the seed
Lies beneath ice and snow
And my heart’s heavy now
But I’m not letting go
Of this hope I have
That tells meSpring is coming
Spring is coming
And all we’ve been hoping and longing for
Soon will appear
Spring is coming
Spring is coming
It won’t be long now
It’s just about here

Hear the birds start to sing
Feel the life in the breeze
Watch the ice melt away
The kids are coming out to play
Feel the sun on your skin
Growing strong and warm again
Watch the ground, there’s something moving
Something is breaking through
New life is breaking throughSpring is coming
Spring is coming
And all we’ve been hoping and longing for
Soon will appear
Spring is coming
Spring is coming
And it won’t be long now
It’s just about here

Spring is coming
(Out of these ashes, beauty will rise)
Spring is coming
(Sorrow will be turned to joy)
And all we’ve been hoping and longing for
(All we long for)
Soon will appear
(Soon will appear)
Spring is coming
(Out of the darkness, beauty will shine)
Spring is coming
(All above in heaven, rejoice)
It won’t be long now
(Spring is coming soon)
It’s just about here
(Spring is coming soon)

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Heather Villalta: Parking Extrordinaire...

…or not.

Today we did parking a lot, although we did do a little bit of just driving around to begin with. We started out in the slanted parking spaces, which are easier to park in. But I still only had it correct once or twice. We did that over and over, but I guess parking is something you don’t improve at very quickly.

After that Leanne wanted me to try parking in a parking spot next to a cub, but I failed miserably at that, so she decided to save that for later. We then went to parking in straight spaces, which are harder than slanted ones. I did okay. I need to start really paying attention to other people’s driving and see how and why they do certain things.I will throw random facts into my driving lesson reviews every once in a while if I have them.
Random facts:
1) Sherry learned to drive in the same parking lot at the church and doesn’t know how to drive a stick shift.
2) Leanne could get her car impounded if I drive in it on a public street without a permit or license.
3) Parking stinks. Especially parallel parking.

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Jesus Will Meet You There

This is the eleventh song off Steven Curtis Chapman’s new album, Beauty Will Rise.

Jesus Will Meet You There
by Steven Curtis Chapman

When you think you’ve hit the bottom
And the bottom gives way
And you fall into a darkness
No words can explain
You don’t know how you’ll make it out alive
Jesus will meet you thereWhen the doctor says “I’m sorry
We don’t know what else to do.”
And you’re looking at your family
Wondering how they’ll make it through
Whatever road this life takes you down
Jesus will meet you there

He knows the way to wherever you are
He knows the way to the depths of your heart
He knows the way ‘cause he’s already been
Where you’re going
Jesus will meet you thereWhen the jury says “Guilty”
And the prison doors close
And the one you love says nothing
And just packs up and goes
When the sunlight comes and your world’s still dark
Jesus will meet you there

When you’ve failed again and all your
Second chances have been used
And the heavy weight of guilt and shame
Is crushing down on you
And all you have is one last cry for help
Jesus will meet you thereHe knows the way to wherever you are
He knows the way to the depths of your heart
He knows the way ‘cause he’s already been
Where you’re going

When you realize the dreams you’ve had
For your child won’t come true
When the phone rings in the middle
Of the night with tragic news
Whatever valley you must walk through
Jesus will meet you there
He will meet you there
Jesus will meet you there

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I Will Trust You

This is the tenth track off Steven Curtis Chapman’s new album, Beauty Will Rise. There are many songs I am caling my favorites off this album, but I especially like this one. I know the feeling of not wanting to “be” anymore or not wanting to breathe another breath because everything is just too hard, closing my eyes and resolving to not open them again until I’m through with this world because this world is too much to deal with. So I like this song.

I Will Trust You
by Steven Curtis Chapman

I don’t even want to breathe right now
All I wanna do is close my eyes
And I don’t wanna open them again
Until I’m standing on the other side
I don’t even wanna be right now
I don’t wanna think another thought
I don’t wanna feel this pain I feel
But right now, pain is all I’ve gotIt feels like it’s all I’ve got
But I know it’s not
Oh, I know You’re all I’ve got

And I will trust You, trust You
Trust You, God I will
Even when I don’t understand
Even then I will say again
You are my God
And I will trust YouGod, I’m longing for the day to come
When this cloudy glass I’m looking through
Is shattered in a million pieces
And finally, I can just see You

God, You know I believe it’s true
I know I will see You
But until the day I doI will trust You, trust You
Trust You, God I will
Even when I don’t understand
Even then I will say again
You are my God
And I will trust You
And with every breath I take
And for every day that breaks
I will trust You, I will trust You
And when nothing is making sense
Even then I’ll say again
God, I trust You, I will trust You

I know Your Heart is good
I know Your Love is strong
I know Your plans for me
Are much better than my own
So I will trust You, trust You
Trust You, God, I will
Even when I can’t see the endAnd I will trust You
I will trust You, I will
Even when I don’t understand
Even then I will say again
I will trust You
I will trust You, I will
I know Your Heart is good
Your Love is strong
Your plans for me
Are better than my own
Yeah, Your Heart is good
Your Love is strong
Your plans for me
Are better than my own
And I’ll trust
You are my God and I will
Trust You

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God Is It True (Trust Me)

This is the ninth song off Steven Curtis Chgapman’s new album, Beauty Will Rise. It’s about God’s knowledge and the truth of God’s promises.

God Is It True
by Steven Curtis Chapman

God, is it true
That You’re thinking of me
At this moment?
God, is it true
That You hear every prayer
That I pray?
God, is it true
Every time my heart beats
You know it?
Well, if it’s all true
That must be You
I hear saying, “Trust Me”God, is it true
Out of all things You’re doing
On this planet
Could it really be true
That You’ve counted the hairs
On my head?
God, is it true
Every day of my life
You have planned it?
Well, if it’s all true
That must be You
I hear saying, “Trust Me”
Trust Me
Trust Me

I’ll never leave
I’ll never forsake you
Just trust MeGod, is it true
That Your Love for us
Is neverending?
Could it really be true
That You’d die
Before letting us go?
God, is it true
Not even death can
Separate us?
Well, if it’s all true
Then what can I do
But put all my hope
And all my trust in You?
Well, I know it’s true
And I know it’s You
I hear saying “Trust Me”
I hear You saying “Trust Me”

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God Is It True (Trust Me)

This is the ninth song off Steven Curtis Chgapman’s new album, Beauty Will Rise. It’s about God’s knowledge and the truth of God’s promises.

God Is It True
by Steven Curtis Chapman

God, is it true
That You’re thinking of me
At this moment?
God, is it true
That You hear every prayer
That I pray?
God, is it true
Every time my heart beats
You know it?
Well, if it’s all true
That must be You
I hear saying, “Trust Me”God, is it true
Out of all things You’re doing
On this planet
Could it really be true
That You’ve counted the hairs
On my head?
God, is it true
Every day of my life
You have planned it?
Well, if it’s all true
That must be You
I hear saying, “Trust Me”
Trust Me
Trust Me

I’ll never leave
I’ll never forsake you
Just trust MeGod, is it true
That Your Love for us
Is neverending?
Could it really be true
That You’d die
Before letting us go?
God, is it true
Not even death can
Separate us?
Well, if it’s all true
Then what can I do
But put all my hope
And all my trust in You?
Well, I know it’s true
And I know it’s You
I hear saying “Trust Me”
I hear You saying “Trust Me”

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Drive Time!

I am afraid of driving.

I mean, really afraid of driving.

Well, some people from my church (namely Leanne and Cheryl) decided it was time for me to get over myself and learn anyway. Obviously, I wasn’t too keen on the suggestion.But they persisted…

And persisted…And persisted until I finally relented. So, today was my first driving lesson. Leanne is teaching me, and it’s not too bad. She is probably the best person in the world to teach me, too, since she is the essence of everything calm and controlled…which I am not when I drive. We drove around the parking lot, starting with only putting the car in drive and allowing it to cruise forward without the help of the gas pedal. After a time of cruising around and practicing stopping and starting (I can now stop a car without the jerky motion…most of the time), we practiced using the gas pedal and the brake and turning. That part ended up being most of the lesson, which was fine. There is a corner in the church parking lot that I have named The Corner of Doom because the turn there is relatively difficult to make for me. I always mess up in some way or another there. I also parked the car (okay, okay, it’s a minivan) in one of the spots and backed it up, too.

Now for the casualties. I only scratched the car twice. Once when I was too close to a low-hanging branch that needs to be trimmed and once while parking the car. I didn’t know the curb was so high and the bottom of the car scraped against it…no big deal, though, because Leanne has done that, too. So the car survived (Hannah will be so disappointed).But overall, I had a surprisingly good time, despite the fact that I had to stop a few times and take a few deep breaths to relax myself. And I have homework: I have to look up the rules for someone without a driver’s licence or permit, for someone with just a permit, and for someone 18 and over with a license. I also need to pay attention when other people drive.

I will probably have at least one lesson next week, possibly two.

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February 20

This is the eigth track off Steven Curtis Chapman’s new album, Beauty Will Rise. It is about the day that Maria Sue (the youngest Chapman involved in the car accident that took her life) became a Christian, just one month before she went to be with Jesus. I think it’s one of the most personal songs off the album talking about how Steven and his wife, Mary Beth, explained to her about Jesus and Heaven.

February 20
by Steven Curtis Chapman

February 20, 2008
On the floor with her mom
Putting her shoes on
Getting ready for another dayFebruary 20
She says, “Mom, is it true
Does God really have a big, big house
Does it really have a lot of rooms?”
She said, “I really, really wanna go there.”
So I said, “Why don’t we just talk to Him?”
And that’s what we did
On February 20

February 20
I did my best to explain
How it is we all will be with God
How it was the Savior came
February 20
If it’s true what He said
That God Himself sang along
With the beautiful song
Of rejoicing in Heaven
As she prayed, “Jesus
Please come and live in my heart
And someday, can I come live with You?”
And we could never have imagined
She’d be going there so soon
So soon
So soonGod only knows
Everything that happened in that moment
God only knows
What He whispered to her heart
And God only knows
Just how thankful I will always be
That He gave her mom to me (Don’t know exactly what this line says…)
February 20 

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